Sharing is Caring...

  I have my days where I feel pretty. Not everyday, but there are days or times in the day, that I do. This occurs more the older I get. However, not too long ago I had an 'Aha!' moment, as Oprah would say.

 I grew up around a mix of people, not all together in one area since we moved around a lot, but a mix of people over time. When I started school each move I had to adjust. It wasn't the most pleasant experience considering I have a shy nature and it seemed we always moved in the middle of the year. When we lived in Northern Michigan it was a culture shock coming from East Cleveland where everyone's name was at least two syllables to being the only girl in class whose curly hair was a fascination and also the subject of  some cruel comments. Thank goodness for a mother who constantly insisted that I was beautiful, a blend of all colors, a peach. Even though I didn't always believe it, it helped to have something positive in my mind to help fight off all those negative comments and thoughts. When you finally become an adult I always thought those feelings magically disappeared. Now I know it's not true. You still continue to fight.

  I was working in a salon and on a rather slow day we ended up having this deep conversation in the break room. We were all fighting insecurities about ourselves and envying something in another person. When we layed it out on the table the person in the envy chair was shocked. One girl liked another girl's hips because she felt she didn't have any. Another liked another for her funky clothes, another for her height, another for her weight... the list goes on. What I realized in this conversation is what was really happening was we were appreciating their beauty and individuality. The negativity comes into play because we weren't sharing our appreciation so the thoughts became comparisons and then downplays of ourselves. There wasn't enough positives in our mental banks to fight off insecurities. When we heard the attributes we had that were admired by others not only did the rest of our day go by with ALL of our heads held high but it carried over into the next day as well.

  So, this is my thought... You know that moment in the store, mall, gas station, wherever, you see that woman who has the pretty hair, the super cute to die for shoes, the fabulous glasses, the contagious smile, the positive energy? TELL HER! Most times we stare, keep the compliment to ourselves and keep going. Well, what if the woman we stared at saw us examining her and we didn't share the compliment? She might have needed that positive thought to battle some of her own insecurities, because we all have them. It's ok for us women to give another woman a compliment. It doesn't make us look jealous. It actually gives us strength and a boost to our self confidence.